By this time Jesus had already sent Judas out to do the dirty deed of betraying Him. "What you must do," Jesus said, "do quickly."

No one takes His life from Him. He lays it down of His own accord. We see that commitment here as He makes His way out to the very place He had often met with His disciples. It's not for nothing that we are told that Judas also knew the place. Jesus isn't going to run and hide. He purposely puts Himself in the place where He knows Judas will find Him.

And, like clockwork, there he comes, the treacherous leach, along with the servants of the high priest, and hundreds of Roman soldiers to boot, armed to the teeth, carrying lanterns, torches and weapons. But watch, again Jesus takes the initiative — knowing exactly what's about to take place, knowing all things that would come upon Him, He steps forward, and asks "Who are you looking for?"

"Jesus of Nazareth," comes the response.

"I AM He," Jesus says.

Now, on the surface, Jesus was simply answering their question — we could fill in the words — I am He. I am Jesus of Nazareth, I am the one you're looking for. But given how we've seen Jesus pro­gressively revealing more and more of Himself throughout this gospel as the Great I AM, you just have to see that this answer of Christ is loaded with significance.

Did the Roman soldiers pick up on what He was saying? Probably not. Intellectually they didn't follow what Jesus was saying. Certainly they weren't spiritually committed to what He was saying. Nevertheless this testimony of Christ about Himself is so true and so powerful that they cannot help but confess it — on their backs!

I AM, Jesus quietly and confidently asserts, and something of this confession, something of His glorious divine majesty, shines forth so they cannot even stand in His presence.

You'd better believe He is!!

Once they get themselves picked up off the ground, Jesus comes to them again with the question, "who are you looking for?" Again the answer: "Jesus of Nazareth." And again His response: I AM.

Don't forget that this I AM confession is one that gets our Saviour into more and more trouble. More than once they've tried to stone Him and ever since they've been plotting to kill Him.

But He says it again. I AM. He cannot deny Himself.

Before long we'll hear it again in the home of the old High Priest Annas, and then in the courts of his son-in-law, the new High Priest, Caiaphas. We'll hear it once more in the presence of Pilate. Whether He's asked if He is the Christ, the Son of God, or the king of the Jews, His answer is consistent: "It is as you say." He cannot deny Himself.

From the beginning we see the struggle this brings Him through. From the betrayal of Judas to Peter's lashing out with a sword to cut off the ear of Malchus. These too were denials of what Jesus had come to do. But it's in the context of having heard our Saviour's bold and dedicated I AMs that Peter's subsequent wimpy and denying "I am nots" sound so hideous.

"You're not one of His disciples too are you?"

Bold, proud, impetuous Peter — who with such bravado was convinced he would never leave the side of Jesus, was ready to die with Him — is not long in giving his answer — I am not! Perhaps he was afraid of the consequences, having just cut off someone's ear. Whatever the case, given what was going on behind closed doors with the interrogation Jesus was undergoing, it wasn't a good night in Peter's estimation to be connected with Jesus of Nazareth — I am not.

Two more times before the rooster crowed he would make the same assertion — I am not. Mark's gospel informs us that on the last time he even swears to make his point.

By this he was saying, I do not follow this Jesus, I do not subscribe to His teachings, I do not walk in His way. Worse yet in denying He was a disciple of Jesus, Peter was effectively saying of Jesus, He is not!

Now let's make sure we appreciate the seriousness of the situation — do you remember what Jesus said in Matthew 10:33 — "but whoever denies Me before men, him I will also deny before My Father in heaven."

Yet Peter is not consumed? Why not?

Because Jesus is on the way to His cross. He's already prayed for Peter that his faith will not fail, and even after his fall, he will be picked up again and restored. Peter is one of His own, and as He had said — of those you have given Me I have lost none (18:9).

God cannot deny Himself. He will go to the cross in the person of His Son.

Amid all of this our Saviour knows exactly what's going on; Luke's Gospel tells us that it was as the rooster crowed that Jesus was being led through the courtyard and looked at Peter. It was in the face of that look of suffering, but also of love and commitment, that we read that Peter went out and wept bitterly, ultimately being brought to repentance.

Don't miss the care and commitment Jesus has for His own. John 18:8 — I have told you that I am He. Therefore if you seek Me, let these go their way. He is concerned for more than their physical safety. Jesus' "I AM" has turned our "I am not" into "I am not my own." Because He is God, and will not deny Himself, and because He goes to fully pay for all our sins with His precious blood, sinful, selfish Christ deniers like us are made into belongers, in life and in death.