In difficult situations we often hear people say: “You just have to leave it to God.” Often they hardly know what is actually meant by that. True surrender means, as Calvin says, that you leave all your cares and worries at the feet of God and entrust everything to God’s Fatherly care and plan.

We call that “conforming to God’s will.” That is not a problem for us, as long as God’s will agrees with our plans and desires. But our attitude changes when God’s will and way are completely opposite to our plans and ideals. And that happens — sometimes in a very extreme way. Many years ago I read about a plane crash in the Ivory Coast. Among the victims were people who were involved in Bible translation work in Africa: a couple named Bob and Ruth Chapman. They had received three children: two sons and a daughter. Both their sons had succumbed to Malaria. Then there were just the three of them. After this disaster with the plane only the girl remained. Erin, as she was called, was only twenty years old. From the time she was young she had learned to pray. The Chapmans were God-fearing people. As a family they must have prayed countless times: “Our Father who is in heaven… Your will be done.” And now Erin had to pray that all by herself: “Father, your will be done. Teach me to follow you wherever you go, no matter how steep or difficult your path may be, even though it is such a heavy burden for me.”

Gift⤒🔗

Do we understand this? It seems to be so simple: surrender all to God. And it is simple, but not if you must do it in your own strength. That is outright impossible. It is only possible when you believe that God is a Father who can cause everything, also the unimaginable and unbearable, to be for our benefit. Surrender is complete capitulation, contrary to our own flesh and blood. No human being is inclined, or able, to do this in their own strength. The real truth is that prayerful surrender is not an achievement from here below, but a gift from above.                                  

 It happened to Saul from Tarsus. He sat on his high horse. He was self-confident. He was sure of himself, sure that he was identifying with the work of God. He thought himself to be a knight in God’s army. But when the blinding light of the exalted Christ pushed him out of the saddle, he was brought to his knees — and in a sense, he never rose up from that position of prayer. The knight became a prayer warrior and he remained so for the rest of his life. “He is praying,” the Lord said to Ananias about the bloodthirsty wolf. He became as tame as a lamb. Yes, he was courageous as a lion when it concerned the glory and the name of his Master, but as helpless as a lamb when it concerned his own will and plans. Listen to him, “Lord, what do you want me to do?”

Prayerful Surrender truly is a Miracle←⤒🔗

This prayerful surrender truly is a miracle. It is a product of grace. Flesh does not pray, ever since Genesis 3. That is when adoration stopped and the desire to pray stopped. Fallen man demands his rights, or he pouts and complains rebelliously about the pain of life. But he does not pray. The vessel pours out its contents, but there is nothing in it.

Searching for the way to the living God is not natural for mortals, let alone that he will walk on that path. Adam’s route leads away from God. Nothing will change that. “Misery teaches us to pray,” they say. But it is not true. Forget it. Misery does not teach us to pray; God does. And yes, he sometimes uses the difficulties in our lives.  Our circumstances do not teach us to pray, but the Word and Spirit of God do. God takes the initiative.

Communication←⤒🔗

Calvin defines prayer as the communication between God and man, as an intimate dialogue with the Lord.  That is not an exaggeration. But the question still is who initiates that communication?  Our communication with God is broken. We can not restore it. Only God is able, by grace, to reopen the conversation. He repairs the communication. The miracle of God’s grace precedes each path of prayer that we set foot on. Before a mortal being lifts up his heart, the Lord bends his heart down to him. That is how he opens the way of prayer. How exactly does he do that? He comes down from his holy hill by way of his Word. He brings us from our hill of conceit down into the valley. That valley is nothing more than the place of submissive surrender. That is where we meet God, the place where he will receive us and where we may meet him. There we have nothing to contribute but our needy heart. We are like a bird that widely opens his beak in the nest. We do that with the hunger that relies on God’s promising command, “Open wide your mouth and I will fill it.”

Without Shame←⤒🔗

We should never confuse this surrender to God with lethargic resignation or indifference. No, whoever surrenders to God entrusts himself to his promises. Calvin calls that so aptly and in such well-chosen words: “appealing to God’s promises.” The believing prayer appeals to his promises. We do not think we have rights, for what could they be in light of God’s holiness? But we may base ourselves on God’s gracious judgement, the privilege he himself has given us: “Call on me in the day of trouble; I will deliver you.” That forms the basis for my pleading: “Plead my cause, O God! Remember the words you have spoken to your servant.” Because God himself generated this plea we may ask him shamelessly, as Jacob did: “I am not letting you go, unless you bless me.” There is no impertinence in doing that. It means there is a matter of real need. This is “the necessity which knows no law.” We simply are too poor and needy to avoid bothering our Lord. You can be sure that God is not offended by this holy impertinence and that he completely counts on us to do this. The objection that a mere person is unworthy is false humility and could even be seen as prideful. Do we perhaps think it is below our dignity to keep raising our begging hands? If we pray with a heart of surrender, we will leave this arrogance behind. Then we do not just send up a prayer, but we simply become a prayer.

Needy←⤒🔗

This may hurt our feelings of self-worth, but this real need will result in finding much treasure. In our trouble God will show us the length and the breadth of his goodness. We do not have to show off our status of worth or ability like the Pharisees did. We may simply be “a sinner,” like the tax-collector.                         

The often heard complaint: “I don’t know how to pray” could be caused by arrogance. As if we need to be able to know something before we can pray. Praying is more an act of complete inability. It means not being able to do anything but flee and surrender and thus in our needy state go to God, who lets the needy come in and who gives a home to the homeless.                                       

A homeless young boy in the streets of London understood this well. He was walking past a fancy house with a sign saying that this is where they accepted homeless people. He rang the bell and a dignified man answered the door. “Please, could I come inside sir?” “Certainly, if you have a letter of recommendation from a proper authority.” The young boy was abashed for he had no such document. Then he had an idea and said, “Sir, I don’t have a document like that, but could this be my recommendation, please?” Then he pointed to the rips in his pants, the frayed ends on his jacket, the holes in his shoes and on his skinny knees “You may come in,” said the distinguished man, who was the house-father.

So much more does the Lord open his house and his Father’s heart for all who are too poor and too miserable to be able to live without him.  Truly, he who goes to him in his helplessness will not be rejected.

Proof of Entry←⤒🔗

In order to walk the way of prayer we don’t have to polish ourselves. The Lord does not ask for proof of admission. He does not have a toll booth, and he does not ask for accomplishments.  Kohlbrugge once said it succinctly: “The hypocrite and the devil always encourage us to do something; the Holy Spirit tells us to pray.” Praying thus, we renounce our own contributions.  One does not become wiser or more worthy from one’s own contributions.

Do we know what is important for prayer?  It is the heartfelt confession that we do not have to contribute anything; it is grace alone. Grace for the unworthy one. That is true surrender. Surrender is a passive-sounding word but it is an activity that forms the basis for our prayer. It is an activity that expects everything from the Lord. It conforms itself to God’s fatherly will. This kind of surrender can never be a hidden attempt to conform God’s will to our will. It is the other way around. Whoever entrusts himself to the Lord conforms to his will.

Limit←⤒🔗

When you know the whole Bible, you may know and believe that God’s will is beneficial and good, also when his way takes us through desolate places. This subjection to God’s will is the main basis for our prayer.  

Calvin showed this when he was recalled to Geneva with the feeling that he was going to be grilled: “I offer my heart as a sacrifice to the Lord.” It became his life’s motto.  Are we then not allowed to let our desires be known to the Lord? Yes, as long as they agree with God’s ordinances and promises. And then we receive everything we want? No, we only receive what our Father deems necessary and beneficial for us. God would not be a Father if he did not also know how to say “no.”  He knows what is good for us. But can we know that now too? In principle we can. We may unashamedly pray for everything that is good, which the Lord has promised in the Bible. But if we don’t have that as the basis under our feet we had better not try to force him in any way. So, on one side the promises form the basis of our prayer (they give us permission), but on the other hand they also form the limit to our prayers. God’s Word opens the door for us to the immeasurable abundance of God’s gifts, but it also gives us boundaries for the requests we have. We may not cross those boundaries.  And even within those boundaries we may not demand anything from the Lord. The only “force” we may use is the appeal to his gracious compassion. But how he responds to that concretely is up to him. We may not order the Lord to fulfill our every wish, let alone that we should dictate our own solutions to him. Even our most ardent wishes may never be used to blackmail him. Prayer remains surrender. We lay our needs before him. What the Lord does with it is completely up to him. The essence of our prayer lies in the words: “Your will be done.” Let us never forget that the Lord Jesus himself has literally taught us to pray like this. And especially remember that the Saviour himself in the night on the Mount of Olives has even depicted this during his indescribable agony.

Submission←⤒🔗

It is surprising that the act of submission to God is actually already an answer to prayer. When we surrender our own ideas regarding an answer to our prayer, we implicitly trust the manner in which the Lord will answer us. And would not the best of all fathers know what is best for us? This is what is meant in Psalm 37: “Trust in the Lord and he will give you the desires of your heart.” He whose heart and life is in the Lord will receive his heart’s desire. What does that believing heart desire? It desires all that pleases God and that which he has promised.