Why do I call attention to the family in which our Saviour grew up? The reason is that I notice how many parents and grandparents in our churches grieve over a child or grandchild who stray from the path that they themselves have seriously taken with all their weaknesses.

It used to be something we only saw frequently in “marginal families”; nowadays dedicated brothers and sisters also have to deal with it. It also happens to professors and ministers. It is not uncommon that they even have to experience their loved ones’ pure atheism! 

What sadness it brings when baptized children and grandchildren take this stance, and what effort it takes to have contact with them. I write this article to comfort our parents and grandparents. Our Saviour also knows, from experience, the sadness we can experience from unbelief in the family. Nothing has been spared him, not even the unbelief of his own brothers (John 7:5)!

Jesus Grows Up⤒🔗

We do not know much about the youth of the Lord Jesus. The evangelists only give us a little insight. They do write a normal biography but hurry themselves to Jesus' public performances as the Messiah, which started with his baptism by John the Baptist (Acts 1:22). Then it really started, because what follows are the words and deeds his witnesses of the first hour so desperately want to proclaim to us.

That is why it stands out that Luke tells us about the young Jesus in the temple (Luke 2:22). Therefore, his message is so striking, because it shows how the young Jesus, already early on, knew about his high origins and was already aware of his unique calling. At the same time, we learn from what Luke is telling us that Jesus had to compete with the incomprehension of his earthly family: “Did you not know that I must be in my Father's house?” (Luke 2:49). Note that Joseph and Mary were taught by heavenly messengers about their oldest son, but still they had to learn a lot more, even from the young Jesus! And how sad it must have been for him to see this incomprehension, even from his father and mother.

It moves us deeply when we read in Luke that Jesus went back to Nazareth with his parents and was obedient to them. He did not behave like a misunderstood adolescent but was patient with his parents’ misunderstandings!

What happened to the holy family after that? Joseph disappears quite soon in the Gospel. Mary stays in the picture (John 2:1; Matt. 12:47; John 19:25-27) till Pentecost (Acts 1:14). After that we do not hear any more about her. Surprisingly, we regularly hear how Mother Mary kept Jesus' words in her heart (Luke 2:19; Luke 2:51). If there was someone dwelling on the secret of Jesus, then it was his own mother!

Joseph's and Mary's (initial) misunderstanding did not make our Saviour's youth easy, but the unbelief of his brothers must have been very bitter for him. It is so poignant what is written in John 7:5: “For not even his brothers believed in him.”

There is no reason to make cousins from his brothers; here I am following Professor Van Bruggen. If only they had been cousins! But it was his own brothers who did not believe in him: unbelief in the holy family, in the family in which Jesus grew up. The sword of which Simeon spoke (Luke 2:35) went through Mary's heart. She had boys who said, “You can tell us whatever you like! Stop with these stories about your oldest son. We are sons of a carpenter and Jesus is too.”

Why is this written in the Bible? Why does the evangelist John tells us about that unbelief in the holy family. I think that here we have to remind ourselves of Luther’s words: “You cannot draw the Word into the flesh enough.” The Word became flesh (John 1:14), human like us. It is possible that John is not so polemical in his Gospel, yet in his letters he is (1 John 4:2; 2 John 7). John is the apostle who said that Jesus had come “in the flesh”: Jesus had brothers and sisters (Mark 3:32) and as a young man he had to experience that not even his own brothers believed in him: unbelief in the same family, while he who is God's own Son, is your brother, and maybe even sleeps in the same bed as you!

Christ's Wounds←⤒🔗

In Article 21 of the Belgic Confession, it says it so wonderfully: “We find comfort in his wounds.” That is how it is. There is comfort with the Lord Jesus for sad parents and grandparents. Our sorrow is not foreign to him. He has also experienced unbelief, not only from his villagers (Luke 4:29), but even from his own brothers. I must admit that I did not think much about that when I had to preach about Lord's Day 15. That our Saviour “all the time of his life on earth” did suffer, I illustrated with the reaction of Nazareth, with the hatred of the Jewish leaders and all the misunderstandings of his disciples. But I forgot the sadness of his youth: the unbelief in the family in which he became an adult, the misunderstanding by his own brothers!

I know you cannot put our sorrow in our families on par with what the young Jesus had to experience. He underwent it in a unique way, as our Saviour who in his youth was the Lamb of God, who bore the judgment of our sin. But what a comfort it is that he so deeply understands our sorrow about a child or grandchild! He has plenty of experience when talking about sadness in the family! No sorrow has been spared him, not even the unbelief of his brothers. 

And therefore, sad parents and grandparents, know that your Saviour understands and knows your sadness. He can sympathize with our difficulties (Heb. 4:15), because he knows it from his own experience!

Happy Ending←⤒🔗

I do not have to end this story in a negative way. It turned out well with Jesus’ brothers. At Pentecost they are with the disciples and mother Mary (Acts 1:14). Satan did not win in the holy family! What Luke shows us in Acts is no less than the glory of Christ, who by his Spirit also gathers “lost sheep of the house of Israel,” including his own brothers. Two brothers, James and Jude, even became authors of letters in the New Testament. They present themselves as “servants” of the Lord Jesus Christ (James 1:1; Jude 1). That is different from what John 7 tells us. How great that John 7 still has a happy ending: wonderful for our Saviour, and wonderful also for us! The gospel is highly reliable, especially through the witness of Jesus' brothers, who were unbelievers at first. 

I cannot promise our sorrowful parents and grandparents such a happy ending. What Ambrosius said to Monica, the mother of Augustine: “A son with so much prayer for him cannot be lost,” I would not dare to say. But there is God's covenant and there are his promises which we may plead on. We may and can “pray often,” like Luther said. The unbelief of Jesus' brothers was overcome in the end. That gives perspective. But it is no guarantee for those who follow Jesus (Matt. 10:34-37). Jesus teaches us that the “sword” of Mary can also manifest itself in our families. But when facing that sword, we may find comfort in him who experienced that sword already at a young age and knows us as his sheep (John 10:14).